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The prophecy

July 13, 2010

I was speaking to my mom last week; conversation seemed mundane and commonplace until this happened. As I was about to say my goodbye, she quickly added:

Hey, one more thing; Can you send me a decent photo of yours?” She especially put a lot of emphasis on the “decent” part of it.

I just knew what it was for, but still, had to ask her to have my worst suspicion confirmed.

What is it for Amma?” I asked. And she told me……………

Well, the oracle of the family has proclaimed that I will get married “soon” and my family has suddenly, almost frantically realized that they need to start showing interest in the “procedure”.

A kind uncle took it upon himself and has completed my “horrorscope”; I have been informed.

I have also been informed that the extended horde of aunts have set forth on the quest with truckloads of determination.

My experience in life, though relatively small, has taught me one simple truth.

When the Maamis are on a mission, you better get out of the way; i.e. if you value your honor and life.

And I have also been asked to comply with several formalities.

  1. They want a photo of mine in which I look sufficiently decent without my usual beard and my usual bird nest styled hair.
  2. Since “Avani Avittam” is next month, I have also been requested to start following “traditions” and also wear the most complex/ingenious back-scratching mechanism ever invented.
  3. I have also been requested to quit my “meat-eating barbaric ways”.

 

This story is going to get interesting, as I do not intend to do any of the above!!!! Being in America does have its advantages, after all.

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12 Comments leave one →
  1. July 13, 2010 5:08 am

    LOL !!!! OG, come on, your prophecy has been made !!! You are going to get married soon…I am now visualising Vimmuuu in the chained monkey pic comparison….ha ha ha….I want to talk to ur mom…may be I can speed up the whole process…what do u say ???
    OG: talk to my mom??? no ways!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😛 😛
    You mean to say that you have no decent picture of yours ???? He he he hehe….do it na…put that pic here too…and dont u dare to wear a lungi ok ???
    OG: good idea. did not think of that 😛 maybe I should send a photo in lungi wonly 😛
    Love that line on mamis !!!! 😆
    OG: hehehe
    What an explanation for the thread – “wear the most complex/ingenious back-scratching mechanism ever invented” !!!! LOL !!!! 🙂
    OG: it is 😛
    I am enjoying this and waiting for more drama to unfold. 🙂
    OG: ya ya 😛 😛 😛

  2. July 13, 2010 7:56 am

    Aliyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…..I have been reading all your posts, but since you yourself arent around, dint bother to comment 😉
    OG: same here aliyaaaaaaa
    But I had to comment in this….I mean, I had to warn you….

    It isnt as rosy as it looks like…trust me….I wouldnt mean harm to anyone….usually after a guy gets married, he forces other guys to get married so that he doesnt have to suffer alone….but since im basically a nice guy, i had to do this…..
    OG: logic kollam
    DONT GET MARRIED !!!! …. you think you lose only freedom after getting married…buddy, YOU LOSE ALMOST EVERYTHING and gain a bunch of relatives who are just like your parents….more restrictions….more responsibilities……

    STAY AWAY FROM IT !! settle in the states, do not come back….!!!
    OG: well, best of luck to me then, alle?

    • July 13, 2010 3:51 pm

      Vimmuuu, what kind of a husband are you ??? Does L knows that you are talking bad abt getting married ???? Let me talk to her !!!

      You guys are always like this – once you get past 5 years of marriage, then you start proclaiming that marriage was the best thing that happened to you and life is great after the wife and kid came along…hypocrites…accept ur happiness and spread it along…
      OG: hahahahaha!!

      • July 14, 2010 2:24 am

        Yes Uma… why do these guys always tell the same things… big time hypocrites….

        • July 19, 2010 3:25 am

          Biggest hypocrite in the history of mankind…just like other men!!! 😛 He’s completely in love with his wife, but refuses to admit it and pretends he’s chained!!! 🙄

  3. July 13, 2010 8:26 am

    I told you this a long time ago when you started working out to lose weight…Don’t get married as yet – wait till you don’t want to go to Vegas any more…
    OG: I dont think I want to go to Vegas now anymore 😉

  4. July 13, 2010 10:47 am

    Ha ha 🙂

    Good luck getting hold of that decent pic.
    OG: haha 😛

  5. July 13, 2010 10:51 am

    So finally another Dude will go down the Vimmu way 😉 All the best. And I hope our conversation of 6 months ago will resurface in your mind now 🙂
    OG: haha 😛 u still remember eh??? i did actually 😛

  6. July 13, 2010 3:19 pm

    Lol!!! Terrific! Congrats! You’re being sent to the gallows soon! 😆
    OG: hopefully, not that soon 😛

  7. July 13, 2010 3:57 pm

    Evil Laughter X 100 = Crafty

    😈

    I totally believe in Oracles…. May this one be absolutely true…. may the all-determined Maamis drag the devil by his legs, lungi and all…into the flames of matrimony!

    A gal…that shud be the end of you! HEE HAW HAW 😈

    Crafty departs with a Quintessential Hope in heart 😈
    OG: you devil!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. July 19, 2010 3:26 am

    Hahahah 😆 welcome to the club OG!! Indy is down and out…. everyone’s wondering who’s next!!!

    👿 😀 😀

  9. July 25, 2010 4:54 am

    YAY! Congrats already! Do I get to gate crash your wedding?

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