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Nadodikattu VI: Indianization of the Globe!!!!

January 22, 2009

I am not kidding guys!!! The process has started!!! After all, every person in six is an Indian, so this had to happen. This is also shows the extent and depth of our Indian Diaspora over here in America.
As always, it starts with the cuisine, then the language and finally the traditions….
The final phase of our project has started and you would not believe what we did before it commenced!!!

Under normal circumstances, this ordinary guy can answer questions regarding India, its past and its present with a certain poise but unfortunately, under these extreme circumstances, he was totally lost!!!
Under normal circumstances, this suave ordinary guy can deflect questions which he does not want to answer easily. As a software engineer, he got to learn all these simple tricks but today, he was unusually lost for words!!

Case study1 (normal scenario):
Manager: So when is the team going to submit the test scripts? It is already late?
OG: It is a difficult question to answer. It depends on when the developers deliver the code, how many defects they fix and on the overall stability of the application.
(Aha… I won there)

Manager: When are you going to close these 40 defects that are still open?
OG: That is actually a good question and I appreciate you asking me this (OG is thinking all this time). The test team back in India has a lot of test development left remaining. I have conveyed to them that their top priority is that followed by defect resolution. So I think we can take a call on this by early next week when we have a better picture. Rest assured that we are on top of our game.
The priority of the test team is test development, as you know so that we ensure that we squeeze out all the defects now rather than later. (Note the fact that I said the same thing in active and then passive voice).
(Aha… I won there too)

Another weapon that we down-to-earth software engineers use is “Physiological Warfare”. Give your manager the worst case scenario and better that in performance. He is happy and you are happy too!!

But when this ordinary guy gets asked these simple questions, he quivers from head to toe and starts profoundly sweating. I suppose, Hitler, on being to asked to sing a lullaby would have faced a similar predicament.

Case study2 (Kalip scenario): (problematic scenario):

Programmer 1: So why do we break a coconut before we start something?
OG: (Gulp) it is tradition.

Programmer 2: But why, there has to be some reason behind it?
OG: We….Indians….err…….do it to ensure the successful completion of what we start.

Team Lead: So how do you break the coconut? Throw it or use a hammer or jump on it?
OG: Well, We…I …err… think that we throw it against a stone to achieve maximum damage using the minimum force.

Manager (the mastermind): So, do you want us to throw it on its head or in its side?
OG: I think…we…. (kicking myself by now)…. You… them…. I think the side should be perfect as you want to break it into 2 halves thus ensuring we all get coconut to eat!!

Ladies and Gentlemen,
Have you seen a firangi pick up stuff from the road and eat it!!! I did today!!!! We all had coconut Prasadam today…. To ensure that my project gets completed!!!!
Every member in the team broke a coconut for good luck regardless of ethnicity……….

(Thanks to my firangi PM who seems have met some useless and persuasive Indians in the past…. who had to teach him this, when we have so many good traditions……)
Dear Coconut God,
If you are listening to this, then help us complete our project coz our faith goes beyond our boundaries and barriers and our traditions (as misguided as they may be) gives hope to countless people around the globe regardless of nationality……………..
At the end of day, misguided faith for a good reason is not bad after all!!!!!!!

PS: WHY DO WE BREAK THE DAMN COCONUT??????(and I wish I had a camera to capture the moment; will update post with photo if I get my hands on it from someone else)…..

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30 Comments leave one →
  1. Renu permalink
    January 22, 2009 3:37 am

    Lol:), now I will search and find the reason:) about it. Earlier there was a phrase.to break the bread..ask them why it means..to make friends..then may be we can explain the breaking of coconut:)

  2. Ajit permalink
    January 22, 2009 3:50 am

    hahahaha 🙂
    yeah, I should have thought of that….. 😛
    Thanks

  3. Kislay permalink
    January 22, 2009 3:54 am

    Coconut God ? Awesome ! One more in the 330 million long list . And yes , why do we do that ?

  4. Ajit permalink
    January 22, 2009 3:56 am

    hahahaha… Kislay…

    I think I will need to refer my good old wiki… to see if it has anything on this….

  5. Renu permalink
    January 22, 2009 5:20 am

    Worship of Ganesa or Vinayaka is common in Tamil Nadu when the people like to take a vow to prevent a catastrophe or to offer thanks for fulfilling a request. Prayers to this deity take the form of smashing the coconut to smithereens . This is symbolic annihilation of the three undesirable forces working in man, preventing his spiritual emancipation
    saw this explaination..though this is a ritual not in TN only we in north also do this:)

  6. Ajit permalink
    January 22, 2009 5:41 am

    Thanks Renu,
    I appreciate it…
    learnt something new….
    Thanks….

  7. Renu permalink
    January 22, 2009 7:28 am

    One more thing..Since Vinayaka is considered a god who is VIGHN HARTA , so he is worshipped before starting anything ..any project..so that it completes without any hurdles..this is mine , a north Indian’s explaination:)

  8. Chirag permalink
    January 22, 2009 7:46 am

    Warfare has Begin 😉

    @Every 6th Person is an Indian
    Me -Indian
    Mera Boss – Indian
    Mera Boss Ka Boss – American
    Sabse Bada Boss – Indian

    So I get the Idea and you are a Programm Manager

    @Breaking Coconut: Just tell them, we outsource it … Ha ha ha

    Good luck for your project.

  9. Ajit permalink
    January 22, 2009 7:49 am

    Thanks renu once again… actually that explains a lot….
    everything is so symbolic… ain’t it…

    Chirag,
    yeah, we will outsource that as well…. 🙂 hahahaha
    and thanks for project….

  10. hitch writer permalink
    January 22, 2009 7:52 am

    Coconut God !! Amen !!

    good luck buddy !

  11. Ajit permalink
    January 22, 2009 8:11 am

    Thanks hitchwriter…

  12. Smitha permalink
    January 22, 2009 1:54 pm

    Ajit – Lol !!! That was fun! Yes, we are very successfully indianizing the globe. My colleagues taught our British colleague Kannada once 🙂

  13. Vinod_Sharma permalink
    January 22, 2009 4:14 pm

    Good one …Coconut God?!!

  14. Indian Home Maker permalink
    January 22, 2009 4:16 pm

    I remember Amitabh Bachchan in a movie, he was accusing God in a temple, blaming him for increased demand and hence the rising price of coconut …

    Now he will shift the blame to you.

    🙂

  15. Ajit permalink
    January 22, 2009 4:18 pm

    hey Vinod Sir,

    yes coconut God; merely added another deity in the millions that we have already…..

    IHM,
    I dont want the angry old man behind me…… 😛

  16. Ajit permalink
    January 22, 2009 4:19 pm

    and smitha,
    Dont let us down… 😛
    teach them malayalam….LOL

  17. Vinod_Sharma permalink
    January 22, 2009 4:22 pm

    More the merrier! Jai ho!

  18. Smitha permalink
    January 22, 2009 4:28 pm

    @Ajit – Lol – people will prob tell you – ‘she will have to learn it first ‘:) See this is why – I should shut down the laptop – can’t get any work done – love following the comments so much 🙂

  19. kanagu permalink
    January 22, 2009 5:09 pm

    LOL 🙂
    Coconut god has made me to laugh in a big way … 🙂

  20. Ajit permalink
    January 22, 2009 6:11 pm

    hahahaha 🙂
    smitha… very bad… 🙂 LOL

    jai ho to you too, vinod ji..

    Thanks kanagu…..

  21. Indian Home Maker permalink
    January 23, 2009 4:39 am

    Published 🙂

  22. L. Venkata Subramaniam permalink
    January 23, 2009 11:46 am

    I like this Indianization! All success to it from me!

    Is that an actual conversation?

  23. Ajit permalink
    January 23, 2009 3:36 pm

    yes Venkat,

    I am not kidding…
    This actually happened….

  24. Indyeah permalink
    January 23, 2009 7:53 pm

    lol!This is so funny!I can just imagine them doing this….:D
    please do try and get pictures…:D

    Team Lead: So how do you break the coconut? Throw it or use a hammer or jump on it?
    OG: Well, We…I …err… think that we throw it against a stone to achieve maximum damage using the minimum force.
    Manager (the mastermind): So, do you want us to throw it on its head or in its side?
    OG: I think…we…. (kicking myself by now)…. You… them…. I think the side should be perfect as you want to break it into 2 halves thus ensuring we all get coconut to eat!!

    LOL!!!

    now on to the qusetion…why do we break a coconut before any new project/work…etc..etc..car and all…

    Well, the explanation or rather the conclusion we arrived at in our history class was…that this is a symbolic offering of an animal/human…
    which struck me as rather gory…even if its true..(maybe)

    however I like these explanatioms much better ,found them on the net….

    ”Breaking a coconut in Hindu temples – especially in temples dedicated to Lord Ganesha – and before auspicious events and new beginning is considered highly beneficial in Hinduism. The offering of a coconut is a common offering to a deity in Hindu religion and it is distributed later as ‘prasad.’
    The most important reason for offering coconut is that is the purest thing that a human being can offer to a deity. The water and the white kernel inside the coconut are the only unadulterated offering that a devotee makes to the Lord. It is not polluted as it remains covered by the hard outer shell until it is offered to the God.

    Lord Ganesh is the deity invoked before any auspicious event or new beginning. Coconut is one of the most favorite foods of Ganesha. This is one reason why coconut is broken during housewarming, after the purchase of new vehicle etc.

    Next, the breaking of coconut symbolizes the breaking of the ego. The coconut represents the human body and before the Lord it is shattered – breaking the ‘aham’ or ego and symbolically total surrendering and merging with the Brahman – supreme soul.

    Coconut is also an important aspect in Kalasha or Poorna Kumba.
    Apart from this there are numerous other symbolic meaning to the coconut. Most of them revolve around its appearance like the three eyes on the coconut represent the three eyes of Lord Shiva.”
    This article found here http://www.hindu-blog.com/2008/03/why-do-hindus-break-coconut-in-ganesh.html?showComment=1229690040000

    🙂

  25. Solilo.. permalink
    January 23, 2009 9:35 pm

    Jai ho Coconut God ki!

  26. Ajit permalink
    January 23, 2009 9:40 pm

    Thanks Indyeah, that was some explanation….. 😛
    i liked the breaking of the Ego, the best explanation…. 😛
    Thanks once again….

    and Solilo, Jai ho to you too…. 😛

  27. Winnie the poohi permalink
    January 25, 2009 3:09 am

    LOL! LOL!!!

  28. Ajit permalink
    January 25, 2009 3:36 am

    😛 winnie….
    just listing down my experiences…

  29. Happy Kitten permalink
    January 27, 2009 6:56 am

    Never thought abt our good old coconut this way until you took us down the humour lane and then left us with the question (which I have never asked) which got answered through the comments.

    Yea breaking our ego and submitting ourself to the Almighty. Have to admit the wisdom of our forefathers.

  30. Ajit permalink
    January 27, 2009 7:39 am

    yeah happy kitten, we did follow a lot of good things in the past but somehow, right now, nothing holds meaning……
    i did not know the story behind it till now and i have folowed it all these years…
    That is what needs to change in our society

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