When I also had to undergo a Sex Change!!!!

Note: Guys, please do not take offense, importantly Vimmuuu!!!!

I am going to tell you all a sad tale. A poignant tale about how OG turned into something he was not and about how a certain Don hatched a despotic plan to take over the world.

Don Sololi has tagged me and a few other unfortunate souls to list down 5 crushes of ours if we were a girl / woman / lady. Being proud of my manhood, I initially refused to do the tag. But alas, Don Sololi had other ideas.

She sent her goons to capture me and I soon went into hiding. I missed getting caught by the skin of my tooth (It was a close call). Since those despicable creatures did not find me, they captured my brother Vimmuuu and he was taken to the “Don Solology Lab” for eugenic testing. I don’t know what they did with my friend, but at that moment, I swore on the grave of “Genghis Khan” that I would find and punish the perpetrators and stop the evil Don Sololi from taking over the world.

I initially sought the help of a brave warrior, better known as Kisladious in the blogiverse. But little did I know that the evil Don had spread her tentacles far and wide. If I had known that Kisladious had also switched allegiance to the dark side, I would never have gone to him for help. But being the idiot I was, I went to him and promptly the evil goons of the Don captured me as well. I did not go down without a fight but the evil warrior Indyeahician, a student of the great Ghatotkacha himself, used “maya warfare” to overwhelm me.

At that moment, I felt like William Wallace, the great warrior who was captured by the enemy forces in a similar manner. And after a couple of days march in chains, I reached the gargantuan fort otherwise known to the general public as “Don Solology Lab”. As I passed through the entrance, I felt a shiver run up my spine and a feeling of helplessness engulfed me.

What hope did man-kind have left? I thought to myself!!! I just hoped that there was someone else left in the outside world who would continue our crusade against tyranny, against evil woman power and more importantly against the Don herself!!!!

The goons soon locked me in a strange apparatus and I was hardly able to move. After a couple of minutes, I heard a loud hearty guffaw and I knew that the Don had stopped by for a visit!!!!

Don Sololi: Buhahahahahahahahaha!!!

Brave warrior OG: Sololi, I will not let you take over the world. As long as good men walk on this planet, the axis of woman power will never take over the world. A couple of days back; I swore this on the grave of Kublai Khan’s grandfather.

Don Sololi: You are talking nonsense, brave warrior OG. The forces of “good men” are all but vanquished. Most of the mutineers are already locked up except a few who soon will be caught. The days of men are numbered. I have already sent my commander Indyeahician to finish off the rest of you guys and my generals Smithus, Badzus to take care of things in England!!!!

BW OG: Evil Don, even the big mighty elephant can slip. Remember that!!! As long as we have “dharma” on our side, we will continue the fight!!!

Don Sololi: Buhahahahahahahahaha!!! Let us see!!!! Now I plan to conduct my eugenic experiment on you!!!!! Let me see as to how your “dharma” is going to protect you. I have already converted Kisladious into a girl and I am in the process of experimenting with Vimmuuu. I currently don’t know what “it” is.

NOBODY CAN STOP ME, NOT EVEN AHURA MAZDA!!!!!

At that moment, I heard another feeble voice from my side and it took me a few minutes to realize that it was indeed my brother Vimmuuu.

BW OG: What have they done to you my brother? I can hardly recognize you.

Vimmuuu: Aliyaaaaaaaaaa, I don’t know. But I have been in this testing lab for a few days now and I feel so afraid!!! This Don keeps asking me to give her a list. I first gave her a list with SRK in it and next time, I will give her a list with Farhan Akhtar in it. Sob Sob Sob………….

Don Sololi: Enough of small talks, I am going to start the machine now!!!!

I was soon enveloped by the thick mist of dense white gas and I had to go through multiple spasms of nerve racking pain for a few minutes until I heard the machine stop.

Ppppttttt…bbbbrrr…pttttt…ptttt…..bdddddmmmm….chishhhh

I was totally disoriented and I heard the Don’s voice from a distance!!!

Don Sololi: Now OG, tell me about your favorite crushes.

BW OG: I feel so strange, so different. Okay Don, here is the list…………………………

Vadivelu:

Note that look which only an ultra confident man can have. He can dance like superstar surya, he can talk suave and he also looks so dashing.

Salimkumar:

He is definitely in my list. He can dance, he can act, and he is so comic.

 

Balayya:

There is not a better fighter in this world than this guy. Also note his brilliant smart thinking and his dialog delivery.

Vijaykanth:

This dude is certainly in my list. A brilliant actor turned politician, how can he not come in my list? He is also not afraid of bullets and can speak English like a pro.

 

Don Sololi: Stop OG, this is not what I wanted. Please think once more.

I thought long and hard and after a few minutes, I got an idea. Well, what about AR. He is dashingly smart, funny, can dance and blog!!!!

 After I finished telling the Don, I heard her walk out muttering a few words, over and over again.

“AYYYYOOOOO, Complete Kalippu. Experiment has failed again. Subject has gone insane”!!!!!!!!!!

That was when I heard the two timing traitor Kisladious speak to me:

“I am sorry for betraying you dost. I had no other option. OG, don’t lose heart. I know that my brother Hitchwriterious is still leading the resistance on the outside. Please do not lose hope”.